I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
