No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
i think we sleep fucked last night...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
