So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
