My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
mondays should just be called national damage control day
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize