You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
bring money and cleavage
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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