Texts From Last Night

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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  You don't have asthma, your pregnant

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  (250): You don't have asthma, your pregnant http://tfl.nu/jkmk
  Replies (5) Good night (669) Bad night (1345)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day

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  (802): I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day http://tfl.nu/wkei
  Replies (13) Good night (4285) Bad night (1073)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado

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  (719): 3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado http://tfl.nu/w6qi
  Replies (72) Good night (7692) Bad night (700)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?

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  (502): Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels? http://tfl.nu/vpae
  Replies (12) Good night (1163) Bad night (3871)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away

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  (705): i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away http://tfl.nu/zrix
  Replies (17) Good night (3704) Bad night (1970)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor

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  (315): i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor http://tfl.nu/o59i
  Replies (25) Good night (4032) Bad night (987)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..

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  (706): having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear.. http://tfl.nu/j8z4
  Replies (16) Good night (2220) Bad night (1132)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.

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  (920): I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant. http://tfl.nu/9xux
  Replies (1) Good night (2409) Bad night (844)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night

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  (314): Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night http://tfl.nu/67n5
  Replies (10) Good night (2712) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday

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  (989): Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday http://tfl.nu/e2qw
  Replies (3) Good night (1318) Bad night (579)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.

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  (602): literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk. http://tfl.nu/38ru
  Replies (9) Good night (1986) Bad night (679)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now

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  (207): It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now http://tfl.nu/zpim
  Replies (18) Good night (2112) Bad night (483)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".

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  (720): when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight". http://tfl.nu/l9jb
  Replies (5) Good night (483) Bad night (850)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.

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  (678): Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are. http://tfl.nu/af34
  Replies (4) Good night (685) Bad night (258)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.

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  (702): Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well. http://tfl.nu/ln4y
  Replies (3) Good night (182) Bad night (568)

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