Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Don't make out with my wife yet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Don't make out with my wife yet http://tfl.nu/oypy
  Replies (3) Good night (831) Bad night (856) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children. http://tfl.nu/7iz1
  Replies (109) Good night (858) Bad night (2756) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser http://tfl.nu/xbi4
  Replies (17) Good night (4418) Bad night (1180) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice. http://tfl.nu/s7hm
  Replies (19) Good night (4453) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way. http://tfl.nu/230k
  Replies (16) Good night (7196) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her. http://tfl.nu/wlqs
  Replies (26) Good night (4955) Bad night (1116) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo. http://tfl.nu/korz
  Replies (12) Good night (7740) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I think there was chlamydia in those woods.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I think there was chlamydia in those woods. http://tfl.nu/fxcg
  Replies (5) Good night (562) Bad night (2180) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.

  (319): View more from Iowa

  You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead. (319): You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you. http://tfl.nu/03d8
  Replies (15) Good night (2216) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes. http://tfl.nu/kjws
  Replies (4) Good night (1157) Bad night (492) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber. http://tfl.nu/rkm3
  Replies (3) Good night (1431) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend http://tfl.nu/09b0
  Replies (8) Good night (2031) Bad night (871) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me. http://tfl.nu/noof
  Replies (10) Good night (500) Bad night (1497) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it http://tfl.nu/hn11
  Replies (6) Good night (999) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :) http://tfl.nu/7aie
  Replies (1) Good night (611) Bad night (165) Order T-Shirt

Randomize