I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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