just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....