Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

I think scott just propositioned me for sex

Fav 3 1328 699
share tweet
(603): View more from New Hampshire

his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all

Fav 53 937 4892
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life

Fav 16 8061 1187
share tweet
(386): View more from Florida

Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table

Fav 24 1517 4629
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(630): View more from Illinois

But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them

Fav 10 5683 1156
share tweet
(708): View more from Illinois

he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.

(1-708): View more from Illinois

ahaha ok

(708): View more from Illinois

let's call it "werewolfing"

Fav 6 3083 1118
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(214): View more from Texas

The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.

Fav 11 3386 952
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(323): View more from California

He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"

Fav 3 1575 694
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(856): View more from New Jersey

but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.

Fav 5 63 29
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT