i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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