my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
