Duck Duck Cougar?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
