I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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