I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I wish i was in the wii world.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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