I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Who died my cat blue again?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
