When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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