How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize