So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Farmville is her only friend.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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