Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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