I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
