So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
