You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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