She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You ate ashes out of my bong
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
