so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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