he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
