your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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