i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
