I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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