my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
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