Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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