i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
