I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Don't EVER smell your tampon
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
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