i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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