Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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