no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize