can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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