Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her

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(+90): View more from Turkey

Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university

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(314): View more from Missouri

I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?

(505): View more from New Mexico

The responsible thing...show them the break room.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(519): View more from Ontario

oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.

(1-519): View more from Ontario

like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.

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(330): View more from Ohio

just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.

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(415): View more from California

I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go

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(443): View more from Maryland

sorry I blacked out our whole relationship

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