Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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