I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
