The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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