whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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