I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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