I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Randomize
