Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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