I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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