i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
