im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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