What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
We are all done wearing pants today
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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