when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Randomize
