I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
