What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I am mentally ready for anal.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize